I heart Seth Rudetsky! Above is a clip from his Broadway 101 show demonstrating the purpose of a Swing in a Broadway production set to one of my favorite songs, Hello Twelve, Hello Thirteen, Hello Love!, from what might be my favorite show, A Chorus Line!
As of 10:07AM on this day, August 11th, 2009, I will be 22 years old and beginning my 23rd year of life on this planet. Looking back on the last year of my life, it certainly has been an interesting ride. If you were too look at any of my writing since my last birthday, you'll witness the number of changes I've been through to arrive where I am now. Through it all, I can see how God has kept me safe and used it all to bring me to a place of balance.
Although I've been unemployed most of this year and struggling day by day, the last year has been the most fulfilling and wonderful I could've asked for. So many extraorinary people have been brought into my life that I have the privelege to call my friends, my family even! I know that the next year in my life is going to be even better and that it will prepare me for my purpose and destiny. Full of challenges? Yes! But it's going to be amazing!
I want to extend a HUGE thanks to Mr. Dave Charest (@DaveCharest), one of my favorite people on Twitter for the best birthday present ever! One of my tweets inspired him to write a new song! Take a listen, it's amazing! I hope it inspires you to never let anyone or anything else tell you what you can and cannot do!
Hey Pholks! Have you missed me? It has been a very eventful month for me and I'll update you all very soon!
In the video above, you'll have witnessed the blazing talent of Natalie Weiss singing Spark of Creation from Stephen Schwartz's incredible work, Children of Eden.
This post has double significance tonight. I'm introducing a new set of musings I'd like to call "Ponder and Prattle". These really are the not-so personal ramblings about which ever topic or event births an inspiration. Most importantly, I'd like to invite you all to feel free to respond! Prattle on about what ever thoughts are boiling away! Please be constructive and willing to push your growing edge. I will be moderating (not censoring) all conversations and will not condone behavior unbecoming of all you Phierce Pholks!
That said, allow me to get to what's caused my pondering today: the creative community getting back to telling their truth!
Today, the world celebrated the life of one of the greatest artists to ever walk this Earth: Mr. Michael Jackson. King of Pop. Entertainer extraordinaire. I'll admit, I wasn't Michael Jackson's number one fan, but I have enormous respect for him as an artist and as a human being. In spite of massive public criticism and personal drama, he pressed on, wholly devoted to his craft, his audience and his truth!
Even though Michael spent his entire life seeking out precisely what his truth was, no one can ever deny the presence of his dream of the world living harmoniously throughout his work. He sought to bring people together and did so with music and dance that was thought provoking, but fun and energetic. Watching the memorial coverage today, you'll see that he did just what he set out to do. People were coming together everywhere. All races, ages, demographics and cultures were represented. It truly was beautiful to see.
Michael also represented something more: dedication to improving his craft and learning all he could. A creative's learning never, ever ceases!
Many people I speak to say they feel as though mankind has reached the peak of its creativity, that everything's been done before. That statement infuriates me to a degree even I don't understand. The reason for that thinking is this: those blessed with the gift of creation have become so obsessed with being "the next big thing" that they've forgotten to create from a place of truth. Either that, or, those who begin their careers committed to telling the truth enjoy such success that it drowns out the voice that is sincere and honest.
I read and heard from many that there will never be another like Michael Jackson, and they are all absolutely correct! It is wrong for us to even expect that from anyone in this world, let alone go looking for it. Michael will continue to inspire generations of artists, but it is not possible for any of them to be Michael because they cannot be anyone else but themselves. I ardently believe that the man would be pleased to see that he inspired more people to dedicate themselves to be the best person they could be rather than trying to be just like him.
When the creative community learns to clear the dollar signs and diamonds out of their eyes, the world we'd be living in! Artists have been charged with a single task while they are on this Earth: to tell the truth with the gifts of expression they have been granted. We have the ability to being about change and healing to society in ways that no one else can.
Am I saying that it's wrong for us to desire tremendous success? Never! I know that I do. I am saying that it is wrong for us to get comfortable. We must continuously strive to learn more and be more in the next moment than we are in this one. When we do, the possibilities are limitless!
Get back to the basics Pholks! You are your own unique and valuable contribution to this world. The world needs you and your truth, not a carbon copy of those who've come before us. By moving forward, we honor their memory to a greater degree than dwelling in the past shall.
Have you ever listened to a song and your present environment or action just aligns so perfectly with the melodies and lyrics? As though, for a brief moment, someone from another world could have been watching you?
Traveling between Manhattan and Brooklyn on the 'N' train is a highlight of my commute experience. It's a beautiful moment when the train trudges up the incline into the outside world on its route over the Manhattan Bridge and, for just a few moments, you have the most spectacular view of the Manhattan and Brooklyn skyline with the Brooklyn Bridge stretching across the river. There is a certain magic about it when you see it at night, like looking at a living picture of a galaxy.
On my way home today, Beyoncé Knowles filled my eardrums as electronic pulses streamed from my Zune to my tiny black earbuds. That's Why You're Beautiful was the song that shuffle mode rendered next in my playlist as the train pulled itself over the bridge. The first two lines of lyrics took on a new life and brought so much more out of the entire song for me.
Diamonds used to be coal, Look young, 'cause they got soul. That's why they're beautiful.
Today was a peculiar day, but a beautiful one nonetheless. After a meeting, I finally got the chance to spend much needed time with someone whose friendship I've come to value beyond words(The Manager). It's been a while since I last got to see him, but just speaking to him helps me to put things in perspective and challenges me to take steps forward. We got to talking about my previous post, as it's an experience that we both are sharing.
We took time to analyze the things that we need to accomplish and the things we would like to have and wrote them out. We are aware that there is so much that God has in store for us, but it's up to us to reach out and take hold of it. The challenge of course is having the courage to step out and reach for it.
On the train ride home, I saw the position I am in at the present, and things look meager and are getting increasingly difficult. Then the rich bass chords reverberated in my skull followed by Beyoncé's voice and I have remembered to appreciate the times like this that help to define who we are and shall become.
Diamonds are an incredible natural phenomenon. Formed under unimaginable pressure from coal, a softer substance, they are the hardest substance known to mankind and yet beautiful. At this point in my life, the pressure is building continuously, solidifying the deepest and brightest parts of my character. I am approaching the time to be harvested and then new work begins.
If you've ever seen a diamond before it is cut, you'd know it's not much to behold. It's only after it has been cleaved and cut that you can see the result on the second floor at Tiffany & Co. on Fifth Avenue. In the sense of the Proverb "iron sharpens iron", it is only possible for a diamond to be cut by another diamond. It is a long and arduous process, but the result is clarity that is majestic to behold.
I do not know precisely what others see in me and I don't know how grand God's plans are for my life, but I know they are great. Now is the time that I am being prepared to meet those who will be a part of the process of shaping my destiny according to my purpose as I do the same for them.
I find it funny that at the times that I have everything and the world to talk about, I don't sit myself down to write about it. It's at these times when I can't make any kind of sense out of what's going on inside of my head that I can't help but sit down and write. No particular direction to move in, no specific train of thought, just a need to express in some way shape or form. An expression that is sincere and truthful, but where is it coming from?
It is a frustrating experience, being one with an over active and detailed imagination. No way to focus my thoughts or energy, I just need to create. I am sitting, here at my computer desk accompanied by a cup of tea that will probably result in keeping me awake longer than I should be.
Why is it such a challenge for me to have a direct connection with what I am feeling? In this moment? Am I afraid of being confronted with truth or of being vulnerable?
I'm lost.
Lost is the about the only word that comes to mind and I feel a tremendous grief welling up right now. I don't know why. Part of me wants to apologize for complaining, but why should I?
I've identified that there is clearly something not right as this moment, but I feel stuck. Frozen is more appropriate.
Anger also seems to have it's part to play. Reading over what I've written so far, rage is building up little by little.
No.
At the root of it all, I am feeling hopeless. Beneath my usual bright demeanor and voiced optimism, I feel hopeless. But why? Why do I feel as though I have nothing going for me, when I know in my mind that I have so much? Why is it difficult for me to believe that I have power when I sense that I have great power?
Sure I've come to identify incidents and patterns from my upbringing that have influenced how I perceive myself. But where does that leave me? How do I move from here?
Moments like this made me wish that I dreamed more at night. From the time I started Junior High School up until February of this year, I cannot remember having a single dream. Since February, my dreams are few and far apart, occurring maybe once or twice in a month.
What is odd is that I am a person with great ambitions who knows they have the potential to excel beyond any one person's reckoning. Yet, I feel like the smallest person on the face of the Earth. Insignificant.
To many I seem very self-certain and to others, I come across as arrogant. Am I really? Or am I trying to find some kind of means to validate myself?
This video is Natasha Richardson's brilliant performance as Sally Bowles in the 1998 revival of Cabaret, for which she won a Tony Award as a part of her distinguished career that was unfortunately cut short as she passed away as a result of an accident. Listen to the song and watch as she nails every emotion, particularly after the song and you'll be able to put a face to how I'm feeling at this moment.
It's my belief that everything we experience is for a purpose and shapes who we are in this moment and the next. Whether the result is positive or negative is completely up to the individual. With a case of acute Bronchitis that developed into an awful sinus infection, I had a packed schedule and pushed myself to honor my commitments. It became one of the most valuable learning experiences I could've asked for.
What I Did For Love from A Chorus Line is playing. How appropriate!
I won't go on to gloat about all that I managed to accomplish. I'm quite sure it would look like chump change in comparison to many others out there. However, I was determined to transform being festooned with viral plague into a performing bootcamp. Let's face it, when you have a gig, you do what you have to do to show up, at least if you're not in your death bed. The folks in charge may decide it's best for you not to go on, but you showed up! Ready to give them 100%. It shows you and the rest of the world just what you're made of.
So many extraorinary people have been brought into my life that I have the privelege to call my friends, my family even! I know that the next year in my life is going to be even better and that it will prepare me for my purpose and destiny. Full of challenges? Yes! But it's going to be amazing!
